Setting Family Boundaries

We've been studying boundaries in my Sunday School class for a few months now... This has been something I've know I needed to do for a long time, especially since we had our baby...

Recently I got in a huge argument with my mom, because she kept asking me questions about things my husband felt, said, etc. (Specifically, this was related to a business venture that my dad started up, and he hired my husband as a contractor... and mom was made CEO of the company.) There were a couple conversations in which I tried to gently explain that she or dad needed to talk to my husband, rather than talking to me about these things... but she would just get angry that I was "withholding information".

It finally all blew up when she called me one morning and asked me if he was going to work that day... and I told her I didn't to be in the middle of it. She responded "Too bad! You are in the middle of it"... and I said, no, I'm drawing a boundary here... She proceeded to yell at me, so I hung up on her, believing that I didn't deserve this treatment. I cried as soon as I did it, but I knew in my heart that I had done the right thing.... finally, after all these years, I've drawn a healthy boundary with my mom....

That night we talked some more, and she told me that we've been spending too much time together and that we need to allow some more space. I thought that was good, and I agreed with her. She also expressed to me that she felt taken advantage of in regards to babysitting our daughter. (She's always expressed to me that she loves spending time with her granddaughter and seemed to want every opportunity she could get... Who wouldn't take advantage of that?!?) I told her that I was glad she told me, that I was glad she was setting a healthy boundary with me! She didn't like my response... I guess I didn't get emotional about it, she felt like I didn't care or something.

The really freeing thing about all this was that it was the first time I can remember not caring what she thought. I knew I was doing the right thing for myself and my family (and ultimately for my relationship with my mom too), and it felt great!

Since then, mom and I have talked as though nothing even happened... which I must admit worries me a little... I am praying that God will help me to be strong and reinforce this boundary thing each time it comes up!